A few years ago, X asked me to start a blog to record my thoughts, feelings, experiences, fears, and just about everything and anything to do with my ‘slut journey‘
At the time, I was shy and awkward, practically afraid to say cunt or admit I’m a slut and I really want this. I mean, I knew I was and that I did want it, but actually saying it out loud was a different story (ahem, lets blame it on the facts that I was living at home with my parents [with my bedroom next to theirs] at the time, and X and I were so used to being in constant written contact, I was used to discussing being a slut but not actually saying the words lol).
It has been quite a journey!
I went from being a shy little girl to being a confident, out-there-and-proud slut. A bitch on heat so happy with (and proud of) her whorish ways she gladly revealed far more than words! I went from secretly writing blog entries and jumping every time I heard someone walking near by the room I was in, to being splashed all over the internet.. Showing off pics and vids, doing live cam shows, taking requests etc.
Quite the transformation, no?
Now, in terms of the feelings involved and the sense of pride, nothing has changed.
But like I’ve always said, I’m on a slut journey.
I feel like the place I’m at now – wanting to keep things a bit more private – is sort of coming full circle. Going from being shy, to being blatant, to now cherishing my sluttiness but knowing that it doesn’t have to be the main thing that defines me. It doesn’t have to be in everyone’s faces. It doesn’t have to be put out there, all the time, for everyone…
Sort of like… My slutty nature is a gift to be cherished, right… To be used properly, utilised and appreciated.
It’s not for everyone (to see and/or experience), and it’s not the main thing about me… But it is constant and influences my everyday life… I like to think that it’s the sparkle in my eyes. I can either put myself out there as basically a free hooker, or I can be that intriguing young lady with a very naughty glimmer in her eyes which guys simply can’t wait to discover ;)
I guess what I’m trying to say is that right now I want to be discovered, unwrapped, explored — more than I want to show it all off and be defined by it.